To be or not to be

Yesterday I wanted to seach for some images in Google to have an idea on how to decorate my graduation photo album cover. I didn't find any good designs, surprisingly, I found a picture where the person inside was wearing a graduation rope which was so similar to mine and his face looked like Kevin. I entered the blog and Oh my Gosh, that's absolutely Kevin with his father. I had a look in his dad's blog talking about his son and found that this person is quite cute, funny and brilliant. After reading this, I realise that sometimes, we need to step outside, look further, take a deep breath and remind ourselves of who we are and who we want to be. Who we want to be doesn't mean we want to be somebody else and work as hard as they can to fulfill thier dream. I once want to be as hardworking as other, I planned to study till 2-3am at midnight. After few days, I gave up to be somebody, I decided to be my ownself again. It's not lazy but I think I'm crazy if I study in such unhealthy way. Eventually, I promise myself to sleep before 12 everyday if possible until now, unless I think there are some important things that I have to keep myself awake. I believe that we are solely responsible for our choices, and we have to accept the consequences of every deed, word, and thought throughout our lifetime. I always wonder the real me is acceptable or not. I'm not popular, but I have a list of good friends. I'm not rich but I have what I need. I may not be liked, but I wish so. frankly speaking, it's better to have enemy who honestly tell you that he hate you rather than having a friend who always putting you down secretly. It's really very hard for me to find a true friends with no intention and can make you happy. On the other hand, waiting for someone to make you happy is the best way to be sad. *sigh*